Rain:586: Persona

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Author Notes

Little artistic note of all things that I want to bring up on this one.  The page before this was the last one I'd drawn before the whole cancer ordeal had me not drawing anything two months.  When I finally got back to it, I apparently forgot what side of the bed Rain and Emily were on.  As a result, they've switched.  Oops?  Just make up a reason for them to switch and we'll roll with that. XD

On topic, Emily's got a lot more to say, but this is already a two-pager.  Much as I hated the idea of splitting any of this week's pages, it's a necessary evil sometimes if I don't wanna work myself into the ground doing a seven-pager.  So, expect a lot of "multi-pager" updates this week as we finally make our way to the end of this chapter and the year.  ^_^


Why are you so awesome, Emily?
You're here with me, accepting me, defending me, and doing everything in your power to make me more comfortable. But why?
Not that I need a reason, but it shouldn't be that hard to imagine. You've been that selfless for me too.
Though you are likely my first real friend in over a year. I've spent too much time alone, and the rest of my time alienating people. I don't want that to happen with you.
Plus... I really do want things to work out for you and your family.
Wait, what? Too much time alone? Alienating people?
I've already told you how I'm an only child with no dad, and a mom who's never home, right? So nine out of ten times, if I'm home, I'm by myself.
Then I go to school and put up my fake persona, which pretty much ensures most people don't know the real me. You're one of the few.
I don't understand.
Like Holly and Debbie. They don't know the real me. They're only friends with the fake persona I've made for myself. If I came out to them or announced my pregnancy, they'd probably distance themselves from me. The real me is awkward and antisocial and really kind of a loser.
I don't think you're a loser. I like the real you! And you've been hanging out with Maria and Gavin and everyone else too, and I'm sure they all feel the same.
Oh, I don't know about Maria...
...... ...... ......
But what IS this fake persona anyway?
It started out as an attempt to please my mother that never worked.
But it's also a means of protecting myself from being hated for being who I am.

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